Olivia Denison
Mr. Salsich
English 9
26 February 2009
Brave New Worlds:
How Miranda’s World has Changed and What We Need to Make Our World Change
Olivia Denison
Mr. Salsich
English 9
25 February 2009
Brave New Worlds:
How Miranda’s World has Changed and What We Need to Make Our World Change
Many times, when something bad happens to me, I slowly recognize that my poor actions or decisions have brought about an unfortunate result. In the same way, the characters from “The Tempest” begin to realize what they are doing wrong and make a positive change.
In a difficult situation, you learn to accept the circumstances and begin to realize what went wrong. Both Caliban and Prospero find themselves in shameful situations, but after accepting the consequences of their bad decisions, they mend their ways. When Caliban starts drinking and hailing to the drunken man, Stephano, he realizes how foolish it is to pray to a drunken man. Also, Prospero abandons his fight to get revenge on his brother by giving up magic, and instead, forgives him. Caliban realizes that drinking is not going to solve his problems with Prospero. Caliban comes to terms with how poorly Prospero had treated him in hopes that Prospero will, as well. Caliban learns from his poor decisions and turns himself around by thinking of the possibilities of having a fresh start. Like Caliban, Prospero must resolve his bitter feelings toward his brother and start anew. Prospero finally realizes that there is no use in fighting anymore, after putting his brother and his companions under a spell. (Loose sentence) The resolution comes when Prospero gives up magic and forgives his brother. Only then, do Miranda, Prospero, Ariel and Caliban benefit from Prospero’s forgiveness and surrendering of the magical powers that he loved and used for no good. Now that Caliban and Prospero realize their mistakes, the island will return to a harmonious and tranquil place. (Periodic sentence)
Unlike the new world in “The Tempest”, our world is not realizing what we are doing wrong. In our world today, people don’t accept others for who they are. People judge on skin color, religion, and ethnicity. It is a sad thing to think that people have died and sacrificed so much of their lives in trying to suppress (100 SAT words) these actions and make a positive change, and it has not worked. If people demonstrated acceptance, tolerance and had the patience for others, the world would be a much more tranquil place than it is today. Everywhere you look on the news, in school, in work, someone is deceiving someone else. Very few people are considered loyal. For someone to be loyal, you have to trust them and know that they will stand by you. Someone who is loyal would not try to intentionally hurt another person. However, that is all that people seem to do. Being honest or telling the truth is hard for many people to do, especially if it puts them in an awkward situation. For this reason, people will choose to lie. If people were honest one hundred percent of the time, there would literally be no secrets, torturing, or any kind of deleterious (100 SAT words) problem that comes along with not telling the truth. Everybody who told the truth would have less stress in their lives, instead of worrying if anyone would find out that they didn’t tell the truth. If everybody emulated (100 SAT words) one of these virtues, then the world would be a “brave new world.”
If acceptance, loyalty and truthfulness can mend a fictional story, it certainly can mend a real world with real people. Most importantly, people must accept what they have done, tell the truth and be loyal to one another. Otherwise, the virtues do not work. We must have faith that everybody will follow the three virtues of acceptance, loyalty and truthfulness.
Self Assessment
Writing Issues I’m continuing working on.
I have noticed recently that I’m having trouble with ending and starting by essays. My openings never seem to be intriguing enough and my endings seem kind of boring.
Some strong points I see.
I definitely did a good job checking over my work. The SAT words that I used I think fit well with the sentence I used them in.
Some weak points I see.
My transitions could be smoother from chunk to chunk and transitioning in paragraphs. I think the first paragraph is written kind of messily. It is somewhat hard to follow the sentences because I switch from Caliban to Prospero frequently and it gets confusing.
Grade I would give myself.
A-
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Eleanor's Essay #13
Eleanor Hilton
English 9
Mr. Salsich
February 24th 2009
Brave New Worlds:
An Essay on Peace in the World of "The Tempest" and the Real World
Mankind for thousands of years has struggled with topics such as peace and integrity (SAT word). It is the one goal almost every human being has, yet so far throughout our whole existence we have never met our task. In “The Tempest” by William Shakespeare, Prospero and everyone on the island find peace and kindness, but what will it take to make that happen in the real world?
“O brave new world”, these are the words Miranda says to describe her islands’ new found peace. One reason for this happening, I believe, would be that they all gave up something to create the greater good. Prospero has given up magic. Ferdinand and Miranda have sacrificed everything to keep their love for one another. It also seems as if Caliban has changed his cruel, evil ways. When everyone disposed of their bad habits and such, it created unity, and lead them all to believe that everyone was better, thus creating a greater trust between them all. However, I believe that it wasn’t just the people of the island that helped make everyone happy, but the spirits too, especially Ariel. She was the one who described to Prospero the affects of his magic on everyone. Her words were so strong that he decides to “drown [his] book” and “break [his] staff”. We may never fully understand the power of peace and unity, but must be thankful that at least somewhere, even in books, it is possible.
Unfortunately, our world is not yet as peaceful as the one in “The Tempest”. However, if our world was going to become a ‘brave new world’ I feel we would need to all accept each other. Throughout the years different countries have wanted certain things their way. They would push for the whole world to be the same, but that just cannot happen. We all different and unique in our own way, and we need to learn to accept that. The second thing that I feel our world needs to do is to tolerate each other. It is not possible for everyone to like everyone, but if we all created a compromise (SAT word) between each other and put up with the certain traits someone else has we would be better off in the long run. (loose sentence) The final thing I feel our world should do is learn to trust each other. Right now every country that can afford nuclear weapons has them because they fear that at any moment someone could strike at them. If we all trusted each other there would be no need for everyone to act so surreptitiously (SAT word). These three virtues, I believe, are the keystone to what will hopefully be a brighter future.
The world may not be perfect yet but I feel as if everyday it is improving. If Prospero can change his ways, if Miranda and Ferdinand can quickly fall in love, and if Caliban can change from an angry beast to a kind being, I’m sure that the real world can accomplish peace. (Periodic Sentence)
Graphic Organiser:
Intro:
Mankind's struggle, the tempest's success
First Body:
SD for the greater good
CM's they all sacrificed something to create peace
SD unity
CM's -
SD ARiel and the spirits did the rest
CM's persuaded Prospero to give up magic (quotes)
Second Body:
SD acceptance
CM's some people want everything the same, but we are all different
SD tolerance
CM's stop getting pointlessly mad at others for no reason, comprimise
SD trustworthiness
CM's every country that can afford nuclear weapons has them, afraid of attack
Conclusion:
Peace
English 9
Mr. Salsich
February 24th 2009
Brave New Worlds:
An Essay on Peace in the World of "The Tempest" and the Real World
Mankind for thousands of years has struggled with topics such as peace and integrity (SAT word). It is the one goal almost every human being has, yet so far throughout our whole existence we have never met our task. In “The Tempest” by William Shakespeare, Prospero and everyone on the island find peace and kindness, but what will it take to make that happen in the real world?
“O brave new world”, these are the words Miranda says to describe her islands’ new found peace. One reason for this happening, I believe, would be that they all gave up something to create the greater good. Prospero has given up magic. Ferdinand and Miranda have sacrificed everything to keep their love for one another. It also seems as if Caliban has changed his cruel, evil ways. When everyone disposed of their bad habits and such, it created unity, and lead them all to believe that everyone was better, thus creating a greater trust between them all. However, I believe that it wasn’t just the people of the island that helped make everyone happy, but the spirits too, especially Ariel. She was the one who described to Prospero the affects of his magic on everyone. Her words were so strong that he decides to “drown [his] book” and “break [his] staff”. We may never fully understand the power of peace and unity, but must be thankful that at least somewhere, even in books, it is possible.
Unfortunately, our world is not yet as peaceful as the one in “The Tempest”. However, if our world was going to become a ‘brave new world’ I feel we would need to all accept each other. Throughout the years different countries have wanted certain things their way. They would push for the whole world to be the same, but that just cannot happen. We all different and unique in our own way, and we need to learn to accept that. The second thing that I feel our world needs to do is to tolerate each other. It is not possible for everyone to like everyone, but if we all created a compromise (SAT word) between each other and put up with the certain traits someone else has we would be better off in the long run. (loose sentence) The final thing I feel our world should do is learn to trust each other. Right now every country that can afford nuclear weapons has them because they fear that at any moment someone could strike at them. If we all trusted each other there would be no need for everyone to act so surreptitiously (SAT word). These three virtues, I believe, are the keystone to what will hopefully be a brighter future.
The world may not be perfect yet but I feel as if everyday it is improving. If Prospero can change his ways, if Miranda and Ferdinand can quickly fall in love, and if Caliban can change from an angry beast to a kind being, I’m sure that the real world can accomplish peace. (Periodic Sentence)
Graphic Organiser:
Intro:
Mankind's struggle, the tempest's success
First Body:
SD for the greater good
CM's they all sacrificed something to create peace
SD unity
CM's -
SD ARiel and the spirits did the rest
CM's persuaded Prospero to give up magic (quotes)
Second Body:
SD acceptance
CM's some people want everything the same, but we are all different
SD tolerance
CM's stop getting pointlessly mad at others for no reason, comprimise
SD trustworthiness
CM's every country that can afford nuclear weapons has them, afraid of attack
Conclusion:
Peace
Hannah's Essay
Hannah Staley
English 9
Mr. Salsich
26 February 2009
Brave New Worlds
Prospero’s Island and America
America and Prospero’s island are very different places, yet strangely alike. These places have certain virtues in which make them unique and captivating. While evaluating these places, I found that most of their virtues are along the same lines. These places are really interesting and I think could really learn from each other.
The people on Prospero’s island all came together because of three things; acceptance, maturity and respect. They came together in a way that they accepted each other. They accepted that each of them was different and they weren’t always going to agree. They also accepted each other by being open minded to one another’s ideas and really listening even though it may not have been in their best interest. They also started to get along because of how they all matured. Most of the characters in “The Tempest” slowly started to realize that if they kept being rude to each other things were going to get a lot worse before they got better. They also realized that in order to be friends, you need to meet each other half way and really contribute to the relationship if you want it to succeed. Lastly, respect brought the people on the island to good terms. Respect was key because you need not only be aware of how you are treating the people around you, but also that you are respecting their space and privacy. Respect is definitely important because if there is no respect then there is nothing much to build your relationships on. These three things are really important in any relationship and I really think it helped the characters on the island start to form a bond.
Three virtues I think our world needs to become “a brave new world” is truthfulness, unity and kindness. We need truthfulness because there are enough liars in this world already and if we added more to the mix it would make everything fall apart. Also, truthfulness plays a big role in everyone’s life. Since the day we were born, our surrounding peers have reinforced that lying is bad, so if all of a sudden this world was full if lying people we would have pure chaos. Another virtue this world needs more of is unity. There is so much adversity and disagreeing that us kids are being brought up to think that nothing is amicable. We are being taught that there is only one way to do things and that’s the way we are being brought up to know. Lastly, kindness is a part of what this world needs. There are so many mean people out there who don’t understand that their negative attitude is contagious. Kindness is something that can easily be accomplished, but it’s the people of America who have to rise up to the challenge. Whether it’s truthfulness, unity or kindness, it all binds together in some way and it’s up to the youth of America to make sure these virtues are heard.
Even though we all have our flaws, America needs to pull it together and make this country as safe and loving as possible (loose sentence). We all need to make an effort to enforce truthfulness, kindness and unity. If our country followed Prospero’s island’s footsteps, we will be going in the right direction towards a better America.
English 9
Mr. Salsich
26 February 2009
Brave New Worlds
Prospero’s Island and America
America and Prospero’s island are very different places, yet strangely alike. These places have certain virtues in which make them unique and captivating. While evaluating these places, I found that most of their virtues are along the same lines. These places are really interesting and I think could really learn from each other.
The people on Prospero’s island all came together because of three things; acceptance, maturity and respect. They came together in a way that they accepted each other. They accepted that each of them was different and they weren’t always going to agree. They also accepted each other by being open minded to one another’s ideas and really listening even though it may not have been in their best interest. They also started to get along because of how they all matured. Most of the characters in “The Tempest” slowly started to realize that if they kept being rude to each other things were going to get a lot worse before they got better. They also realized that in order to be friends, you need to meet each other half way and really contribute to the relationship if you want it to succeed. Lastly, respect brought the people on the island to good terms. Respect was key because you need not only be aware of how you are treating the people around you, but also that you are respecting their space and privacy. Respect is definitely important because if there is no respect then there is nothing much to build your relationships on. These three things are really important in any relationship and I really think it helped the characters on the island start to form a bond.
Three virtues I think our world needs to become “a brave new world” is truthfulness, unity and kindness. We need truthfulness because there are enough liars in this world already and if we added more to the mix it would make everything fall apart. Also, truthfulness plays a big role in everyone’s life. Since the day we were born, our surrounding peers have reinforced that lying is bad, so if all of a sudden this world was full if lying people we would have pure chaos. Another virtue this world needs more of is unity. There is so much adversity and disagreeing that us kids are being brought up to think that nothing is amicable. We are being taught that there is only one way to do things and that’s the way we are being brought up to know. Lastly, kindness is a part of what this world needs. There are so many mean people out there who don’t understand that their negative attitude is contagious. Kindness is something that can easily be accomplished, but it’s the people of America who have to rise up to the challenge. Whether it’s truthfulness, unity or kindness, it all binds together in some way and it’s up to the youth of America to make sure these virtues are heard.
Even though we all have our flaws, America needs to pull it together and make this country as safe and loving as possible (loose sentence). We all need to make an effort to enforce truthfulness, kindness and unity. If our country followed Prospero’s island’s footsteps, we will be going in the right direction towards a better America.
Monday, February 23, 2009
Hannah's Polished Essay
Hannah Staley
Mr. Salsich
English 9
February 17, 2009
Music is Universal
An essay on Caliban and myself
OP: Music is a great thing. It’s there for you to offer comfort and support. It is there to help you go into a dreaming state, a state of complete and utter pleasure. When analyzing the character Caliban from “The Tempest” and thinking about myself, we really connect. We both find music as a stress reliever and a really powerful thing.
TS: Music is a type of escape that can “give delight” and make you feel many different emotions. TS2: In the play “The Tempest” by William Shakespeare, music has quite an effect on the ever changing Caliban. SD: Caliban is the type of man who does things without thinking, which gets him into bad situations. CM: Music is his only escape because it’s the only thing he can relate to. CM: When his ears are “full of noises” the only thing he can think about is what he is hearing. CM: He knows that music will never be his enemy, but will work with him to offer comfort. SD: Caliban also enjoys music because it puts him in a different world mentally. CM: When sounds enter his head, it is like he is in “the clouds”, “dreaming.” CM: It’s like a high that keeps reoccurring every time he hears the melody of a song. SD: Finally, this music transforms him from one type of person into another. CM: Sometimes the grouchiest people can come to their senses by listening to a calm and relaxing song. CM: Caliban is one of those people who needs music. CM: He needs music because it helps him get through his day and also acts as a healer. CS: Although Caliban has done some pretty crazy things, it’s always seems to be the music that brings him back to reality.
TS: Wondering what is going to play next on my ipod, I lay on my bed in silence. (Appositive as a sentence opener) SD: Music is one of the only things in my life that can keep me hooked for an extended period of time. CM: When a song comes on I like, I listen closely. (Short sentence) CM: I listen to the words, the beat, and the melody (purposeful repetition). CM: Everything that is pouring out of those speakers is like magic. SD: I know that when I listen to music, I not only listen to the instrumentals, but the lyrics. CM: By listening to the lyrics, you can find out something new about the artist and maybe you can even relate. CM: By relating to the music, I fell that is has had a bigger impact on me. SD: But, my favorite thing about music would probably be the freedom. CM: By listening to music you can feel a sense of happiness, the thrill. (compound complex sentence)CM: You can feel yourself get lost in this comforting, soothing noise. CS: Music is truly a universal thing. CS: Music helps heal hearts, express feelings and show unity.
CP: Whether it is a William Shakespeare character or I, music is a big thing. Music helped us both dream and just enjoying the peace and quiet. Music made us realize that you can be transformed by listening to a simple song. Music helped us realize that we would be empty without it.
Mr. Salsich
English 9
February 17, 2009
Music is Universal
An essay on Caliban and myself
OP: Music is a great thing. It’s there for you to offer comfort and support. It is there to help you go into a dreaming state, a state of complete and utter pleasure. When analyzing the character Caliban from “The Tempest” and thinking about myself, we really connect. We both find music as a stress reliever and a really powerful thing.
TS: Music is a type of escape that can “give delight” and make you feel many different emotions. TS2: In the play “The Tempest” by William Shakespeare, music has quite an effect on the ever changing Caliban. SD: Caliban is the type of man who does things without thinking, which gets him into bad situations. CM: Music is his only escape because it’s the only thing he can relate to. CM: When his ears are “full of noises” the only thing he can think about is what he is hearing. CM: He knows that music will never be his enemy, but will work with him to offer comfort. SD: Caliban also enjoys music because it puts him in a different world mentally. CM: When sounds enter his head, it is like he is in “the clouds”, “dreaming.” CM: It’s like a high that keeps reoccurring every time he hears the melody of a song. SD: Finally, this music transforms him from one type of person into another. CM: Sometimes the grouchiest people can come to their senses by listening to a calm and relaxing song. CM: Caliban is one of those people who needs music. CM: He needs music because it helps him get through his day and also acts as a healer. CS: Although Caliban has done some pretty crazy things, it’s always seems to be the music that brings him back to reality.
TS: Wondering what is going to play next on my ipod, I lay on my bed in silence. (Appositive as a sentence opener) SD: Music is one of the only things in my life that can keep me hooked for an extended period of time. CM: When a song comes on I like, I listen closely. (Short sentence) CM: I listen to the words, the beat, and the melody (purposeful repetition). CM: Everything that is pouring out of those speakers is like magic. SD: I know that when I listen to music, I not only listen to the instrumentals, but the lyrics. CM: By listening to the lyrics, you can find out something new about the artist and maybe you can even relate. CM: By relating to the music, I fell that is has had a bigger impact on me. SD: But, my favorite thing about music would probably be the freedom. CM: By listening to music you can feel a sense of happiness, the thrill. (compound complex sentence)CM: You can feel yourself get lost in this comforting, soothing noise. CS: Music is truly a universal thing. CS: Music helps heal hearts, express feelings and show unity.
CP: Whether it is a William Shakespeare character or I, music is a big thing. Music helped us both dream and just enjoying the peace and quiet. Music made us realize that you can be transformed by listening to a simple song. Music helped us realize that we would be empty without it.
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Hannah's Essay
Hannah Staley
Mr. Salsich
English 9
February 17, 2009
Music is Universal
An essay on Caliban and myself
OP: Music is a great thing. It’s there for you to offer comfort and support. It is there to help you go into a dreaming state, a state of complete and utter pleasure. When analyzing the character Caliban from The Tempest and thinking about myself, we really connect. We both find music as a stress reliever and a really powerful thing.
TS: Music is a type of escape that can “give delight” and make you feel many different emotions. TS2: In the play The Tempest by William Shakespeare, music has quite an effect on the ever changing Caliban. SD: Caliban is the type of guy who does things without thinking, which gets him into bad situations. CM: Music is his only escape because it’s the only thing he can relate to. CM: When his ears are “full of noises” the only thing he can think about is what he is hearing. CM: He knows that music will never be his enemy, but will work with him to offer comfort. SD: Caliban also enjoys music because it puts him in a different world mentally. CM: When sounds enter his head, it is like he is in “the clouds”, “dreaming.” CM: It’s like a high that keeps reoccurring every time he hears the melody of a song. SD: Finally, this music transforms him from one type of person into another. CM: Sometimes the grouchiest people can come to their senses by listening to a calm and relaxing song. CM: Caliban is one of those people who needs music. CM: He needs music because it helps him get through his day and also acts as a healer. CS: Although Caliban has done some pretty crazy things, it’s always seems to be the music that brings him back to reality.
TS: Wondering what is going to play next on my ipod, I lay on my bed in silence. (Appositive as a sentence opener) SD: Music is one of the only things in my life that can keep me hooked for an extended period of time. CM: When a song comes on I like, I listen closely. (Short sentence) CM: I listen to the words, the beat, and the melody (purposeful repetition). CM: Everything that is pouring out of those speakers is like magic. SD: I know that when I listen to music, I not only listen to the instrumentals, but the lyrics. CM: By listening to the lyrics, you can find out something new about the artist and maybe you can even relate. CM: By relating to the music, I fell that is has had a bigger impact on me. SD: But, my favorite thing about music would probably be the freedom. CM: By listening to music you can feel a sense of happiness, the thrill. (compound complex sentence)CM: You can feel yourself get lost in this comforting, soothing noise. CS: Music is truly a universal thing. CS: Music helps heal hearts, express feelings and show unity.
CP: Whether it is a William Shakespeare character or I, music is a big thing. Music helped us both dream and just enjoying the peace and quiet. Music made us realize that you can be transformed by listening to a simple song. Music helped us realize that we would be empty without it.
Mr. Salsich
English 9
February 17, 2009
Music is Universal
An essay on Caliban and myself
OP: Music is a great thing. It’s there for you to offer comfort and support. It is there to help you go into a dreaming state, a state of complete and utter pleasure. When analyzing the character Caliban from The Tempest and thinking about myself, we really connect. We both find music as a stress reliever and a really powerful thing.
TS: Music is a type of escape that can “give delight” and make you feel many different emotions. TS2: In the play The Tempest by William Shakespeare, music has quite an effect on the ever changing Caliban. SD: Caliban is the type of guy who does things without thinking, which gets him into bad situations. CM: Music is his only escape because it’s the only thing he can relate to. CM: When his ears are “full of noises” the only thing he can think about is what he is hearing. CM: He knows that music will never be his enemy, but will work with him to offer comfort. SD: Caliban also enjoys music because it puts him in a different world mentally. CM: When sounds enter his head, it is like he is in “the clouds”, “dreaming.” CM: It’s like a high that keeps reoccurring every time he hears the melody of a song. SD: Finally, this music transforms him from one type of person into another. CM: Sometimes the grouchiest people can come to their senses by listening to a calm and relaxing song. CM: Caliban is one of those people who needs music. CM: He needs music because it helps him get through his day and also acts as a healer. CS: Although Caliban has done some pretty crazy things, it’s always seems to be the music that brings him back to reality.
TS: Wondering what is going to play next on my ipod, I lay on my bed in silence. (Appositive as a sentence opener) SD: Music is one of the only things in my life that can keep me hooked for an extended period of time. CM: When a song comes on I like, I listen closely. (Short sentence) CM: I listen to the words, the beat, and the melody (purposeful repetition). CM: Everything that is pouring out of those speakers is like magic. SD: I know that when I listen to music, I not only listen to the instrumentals, but the lyrics. CM: By listening to the lyrics, you can find out something new about the artist and maybe you can even relate. CM: By relating to the music, I fell that is has had a bigger impact on me. SD: But, my favorite thing about music would probably be the freedom. CM: By listening to music you can feel a sense of happiness, the thrill. (compound complex sentence)CM: You can feel yourself get lost in this comforting, soothing noise. CS: Music is truly a universal thing. CS: Music helps heal hearts, express feelings and show unity.
CP: Whether it is a William Shakespeare character or I, music is a big thing. Music helped us both dream and just enjoying the peace and quiet. Music made us realize that you can be transformed by listening to a simple song. Music helped us realize that we would be empty without it.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Hannah's 1st body paragraph
Hannah Staley
Mr. Salsich
English 9
February 17, 2009
TS: Music is a type of escape that can “give delight” and make you feel many different emotions. TS2: In the play The Tempest by William Shakespeare, music has quite an effect on the ever changing Caliban. SD: Caliban is the type of guy who does things without thinking, which gets him into bad situations. CM: Music is his only escape because it’s the only thing he can relate to. CM: When his ears are “full of noises” the only thing he can think about is what he is hearing. CM: He knows that music will never be his enemy, but will work with him to offer comfort. SD: Caliban also enjoys music because it puts him in a different world mentally. CM: When sounds enter his head, it is like he is in “the clouds”, “dreaming.” CM: It’s like a high that keeps reoccurring every time he hears the melody of a song. SD: Finally, this music transforms him from one type of person into another. CM: Sometimes the grouchiest people can come to their senses by listening to a calm and relaxing song. CM: Caliban is one of those people who needs music. CM: He needs music because it helps him get through his day and also acts as a healer. CS: Although Caliban has done some pretty crazy things, it’s always seems to be the music that brings him back to reality.
Mr. Salsich
English 9
February 17, 2009
TS: Music is a type of escape that can “give delight” and make you feel many different emotions. TS2: In the play The Tempest by William Shakespeare, music has quite an effect on the ever changing Caliban. SD: Caliban is the type of guy who does things without thinking, which gets him into bad situations. CM: Music is his only escape because it’s the only thing he can relate to. CM: When his ears are “full of noises” the only thing he can think about is what he is hearing. CM: He knows that music will never be his enemy, but will work with him to offer comfort. SD: Caliban also enjoys music because it puts him in a different world mentally. CM: When sounds enter his head, it is like he is in “the clouds”, “dreaming.” CM: It’s like a high that keeps reoccurring every time he hears the melody of a song. SD: Finally, this music transforms him from one type of person into another. CM: Sometimes the grouchiest people can come to their senses by listening to a calm and relaxing song. CM: Caliban is one of those people who needs music. CM: He needs music because it helps him get through his day and also acts as a healer. CS: Although Caliban has done some pretty crazy things, it’s always seems to be the music that brings him back to reality.
Eleanor's Polished #12 Essay
Eleanor Hilton
English 9
Mr. Salsich
February 23rd 2009
Transformations:
An Essay on How Music can Affect us All
Every morning when the sun rises, our sky is transformed from a dark starry picture, to a bright blue sky full of brilliant white clouds. (Three consecutive parallel prepositional phrases) Like our world, Caliban and I also transform, but when listening to music.
Caliban, a character in “The Tempest” by William Shakespeare, has one of the strangest and most unusual personalities. For the first sixty-four pages of the play so far our class had learnt that Caliban was always in a bad mood. He would stomp around shouting and making faces at everything. He would curse Prospero, Miranda, and Ariel to no end, and even tried to rape Miranda for revenge. However on page sixty-five we recently discovered that Caliban can change. When talking about the music that “hum[s] about [his] ears”, his face is full of “delight” and joy. He transforms. (Short sentence among long ones) He loves the music so much, that he would see “clouds” and “riches”, and when his dream ended he would cry for them to come back. (Compound-complex sentence) This altogether adds an interesting twist to the story. The one character that we thought flat has become as round as the others. If Caliban transforms with music, what transforms the other characters in “The Tempest”?
For me, I am transformed when listening to music. When I am angry, a song with a good relaxing beat calms me down. When I am sad, listening to a sad song can help me get over the pain. Even when I am happy, playing something I like can make me feel even better. Life for me right now can sometimes get frustrating, and it often feels as if the world has turned upside down. The music not only helps me transform away from a person that isn’t me, but also helps control the clutter stacked around the room that is my life. In William Wordsworth’s well-known “Tintern Abbey” he says, “I have felt a presence that disturbs me with joy”. Although in the poem he probably means that the “presence” is Mother Nature, the same quote also applies to me, but with music. The “presence”, that lies discreetly around me, that “disturbs me with joy”, is the music that I hear when I need comforting or when I am just in the mood to listen. (Appositive) Without music I would be in a wreck of problems and ready to crack. Thankfully there is music, and when times get tough, I know I can sit down and listen to a favourite song.
Even though there are probably many reasons for a transformation, I feel that one of the most prominent would be the transformation with music. Caliban, and I are just two that feel the benefits of music, but I know there are thousands.
Graphic Organiser:
Intro:transformations
1st Body:
SD: Caliban as his bad-tempered self
CM's: we believed that he was always going to be mean
SD: He changes with music
CM's:(small quotes) his transformation from mean to nice
SD's: no longer a flat character
CM's: How will this affect the rest of the play?
2nd Body:
SD: What music helps with
CM's: anger, sadness, even when happy it transforms to an even happier person
SD: Complicated life
CM's: can fix the clutter
SD: Tintern Abbey connection
CM's: the "presence" is music to me, "disturbs" me into a better self
Conclusion: the many transitions
English 9
Mr. Salsich
February 23rd 2009
Transformations:
An Essay on How Music can Affect us All
Every morning when the sun rises, our sky is transformed from a dark starry picture, to a bright blue sky full of brilliant white clouds. (Three consecutive parallel prepositional phrases) Like our world, Caliban and I also transform, but when listening to music.
Caliban, a character in “The Tempest” by William Shakespeare, has one of the strangest and most unusual personalities. For the first sixty-four pages of the play so far our class had learnt that Caliban was always in a bad mood. He would stomp around shouting and making faces at everything. He would curse Prospero, Miranda, and Ariel to no end, and even tried to rape Miranda for revenge. However on page sixty-five we recently discovered that Caliban can change. When talking about the music that “hum[s] about [his] ears”, his face is full of “delight” and joy. He transforms. (Short sentence among long ones) He loves the music so much, that he would see “clouds” and “riches”, and when his dream ended he would cry for them to come back. (Compound-complex sentence) This altogether adds an interesting twist to the story. The one character that we thought flat has become as round as the others. If Caliban transforms with music, what transforms the other characters in “The Tempest”?
For me, I am transformed when listening to music. When I am angry, a song with a good relaxing beat calms me down. When I am sad, listening to a sad song can help me get over the pain. Even when I am happy, playing something I like can make me feel even better. Life for me right now can sometimes get frustrating, and it often feels as if the world has turned upside down. The music not only helps me transform away from a person that isn’t me, but also helps control the clutter stacked around the room that is my life. In William Wordsworth’s well-known “Tintern Abbey” he says, “I have felt a presence that disturbs me with joy”. Although in the poem he probably means that the “presence” is Mother Nature, the same quote also applies to me, but with music. The “presence”, that lies discreetly around me, that “disturbs me with joy”, is the music that I hear when I need comforting or when I am just in the mood to listen. (Appositive) Without music I would be in a wreck of problems and ready to crack. Thankfully there is music, and when times get tough, I know I can sit down and listen to a favourite song.
Even though there are probably many reasons for a transformation, I feel that one of the most prominent would be the transformation with music. Caliban, and I are just two that feel the benefits of music, but I know there are thousands.
Graphic Organiser:
Intro:transformations
1st Body:
SD: Caliban as his bad-tempered self
CM's: we believed that he was always going to be mean
SD: He changes with music
CM's:(small quotes) his transformation from mean to nice
SD's: no longer a flat character
CM's: How will this affect the rest of the play?
2nd Body:
SD: What music helps with
CM's: anger, sadness, even when happy it transforms to an even happier person
SD: Complicated life
CM's: can fix the clutter
SD: Tintern Abbey connection
CM's: the "presence" is music to me, "disturbs" me into a better self
Conclusion: the many transitions
Olivia's Essay
Olivia Denison
Mr. Salsich
English 9
19 February 2009
Music For the Soul:
How Music Makes Me and Caliban Feel
Music is an international entity. It’s everywhere, on the city streets, in the wind. It can even be stored in a one and a half inch by three and a half inch gadget, and with just a touch of a button, your ears fill with sound. I truly believe that music inspires people and can transform them whenever they hear it, feeling emotions through the melody and lyrics.
TS Caliban is not one of the most pleasant people to be around, but even a bad person can be transformed by music. SD Caliban, a mean ugly monster, (appositive noun) is changed into a relaxed gentle soul while listening to music. CM Music gives Caliban a topic to speak about with others and something to resort to when everything is wrong. CM Music is one of the few things that brings joy to Caliban, and that is why he loves it so much. SD Caliban hears his joyful music all the time, even in his sleep. CM The music that he hears “ give(s) delight and hurt(s) not.” CM He will sometimes hear “ a thousand twangling instruments” or “voices” that will wake him from his sleep, but then only to put him back to sleep again. SD The music that he hears makes him see things in his sleep that make him happy. CM He dreams that “the clouds…would open and show riches ready to drop upon [him]”. CM He dreams of the money that will make him so rich that he can either take over the island or sail away from his miseries. CS Of course, it is only a dream, but one that makes him jovial.
TS There are three items I always take with me: mints, chap-stick, and my Ipod. SD Music goes wherever I go. CM For me, music is like a religion; I’m always discussing or listening to some new song and you will likely see me with my headphones on. (short sentence within two long ones) CM Further strengthening my bond to music, my dad always has the radio on in his car and he is always introducing me to new songs and artists. (compound-complex sentence) SD Some would suggest that I know a great deal about music, but there is so much more to learn. CM Just like Caliban, music offers me a topic for discussion to talk about with other people. CM I could talk about various subjects, from the instruments to the lyrics or whether a song is good or bad. (sentence with three prepositional phrases) SD I couldn’t thrive without music, and once I hear a song, I want more and more, just like a drug addiction. CM In the book “Just Listen”, music-obsessed, Owen, has over 9,000 songs on his Ipod, which has become an unattainable goal for me. CM If music was an object, I would hide it away for safekeeping, because music is what makes us, us. CS If music didn’t exist; my life would be meaningless, because music plays a central role in my life.
Caliban, like me, relies on music as a place of refuge, especially in times of need. I feel that music helps both of us get in touch with ourselves, without any limitations on personal expression. Music is a focal point in both of our lives, and without it, our lives would be hollow.
Mr. Salsich
English 9
19 February 2009
Music For the Soul:
How Music Makes Me and Caliban Feel
Music is an international entity. It’s everywhere, on the city streets, in the wind. It can even be stored in a one and a half inch by three and a half inch gadget, and with just a touch of a button, your ears fill with sound. I truly believe that music inspires people and can transform them whenever they hear it, feeling emotions through the melody and lyrics.
TS Caliban is not one of the most pleasant people to be around, but even a bad person can be transformed by music. SD Caliban, a mean ugly monster, (appositive noun) is changed into a relaxed gentle soul while listening to music. CM Music gives Caliban a topic to speak about with others and something to resort to when everything is wrong. CM Music is one of the few things that brings joy to Caliban, and that is why he loves it so much. SD Caliban hears his joyful music all the time, even in his sleep. CM The music that he hears “ give(s) delight and hurt(s) not.” CM He will sometimes hear “ a thousand twangling instruments” or “voices” that will wake him from his sleep, but then only to put him back to sleep again. SD The music that he hears makes him see things in his sleep that make him happy. CM He dreams that “the clouds…would open and show riches ready to drop upon [him]”. CM He dreams of the money that will make him so rich that he can either take over the island or sail away from his miseries. CS Of course, it is only a dream, but one that makes him jovial.
TS There are three items I always take with me: mints, chap-stick, and my Ipod. SD Music goes wherever I go. CM For me, music is like a religion; I’m always discussing or listening to some new song and you will likely see me with my headphones on. (short sentence within two long ones) CM Further strengthening my bond to music, my dad always has the radio on in his car and he is always introducing me to new songs and artists. (compound-complex sentence) SD Some would suggest that I know a great deal about music, but there is so much more to learn. CM Just like Caliban, music offers me a topic for discussion to talk about with other people. CM I could talk about various subjects, from the instruments to the lyrics or whether a song is good or bad. (sentence with three prepositional phrases) SD I couldn’t thrive without music, and once I hear a song, I want more and more, just like a drug addiction. CM In the book “Just Listen”, music-obsessed, Owen, has over 9,000 songs on his Ipod, which has become an unattainable goal for me. CM If music was an object, I would hide it away for safekeeping, because music is what makes us, us. CS If music didn’t exist; my life would be meaningless, because music plays a central role in my life.
Caliban, like me, relies on music as a place of refuge, especially in times of need. I feel that music helps both of us get in touch with ourselves, without any limitations on personal expression. Music is a focal point in both of our lives, and without it, our lives would be hollow.
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Hannah's Essay
Hannah Staley
Mr. Salsich
English 9
February 3, 2009
Freedom and Foundation
An Essay on Imprisonment and Freedom
Being away from anything I know and love is close to unthinkable for me. My home, my freedom and my family are all things that make me who I am. If I were only allowed to see my house once a day, I would be really unhappy. The same also goes for my freedom. If I couldn’t express myself on the athletic field, conduct experiments in science class and lead the Friday GIVE meetings, school would not be nearly as fulfilling or interesting.
If I were imprisoned and could only see one thing through my window it would be my home. My home is my central point and ultimately my safety net. Home is where I can be myself and feel completely safe. I know that if I was to be homesick or in a rough situation, home is just a phone call away. Also, my home is not only a structure but a place that nurtures values. Within the walls of my home I have been taught to be clean, to respect people’s space and to love the people you are with. I have learned that when you obey the rules, not only is a family growing stronger but the walls within the house grow thick. Without my home, I don’t know where I would be. I treasure my home and its contents more than anything in the world and a day without it is unbearable to think about.
I would like to be as free as the ocean. I would like to be able to be carefree and easygoing. I would like to go with the flow and take things as they come. It would be nice to wake up one morning and let go of all life’s worries and concerns. To be able to enjoy the day and seize every moment I have with my colleagues, teammates and friends. I would also love to be as flexible as the ocean. Not being tied to a schedule five days a week and just being able to flow with different currents and land where the waves take me would be a wonderful experience. It would ensure that each day is different and unique. Being like the ocean would allow me to accomplish big and small things. Whether it’s as small as helping out a friend or as large as finding a cure for an awful disease, the opportunities are would be as varied as the ocean. But, when you look at it in the big picture, the ocean never ends. It comes and it goes just like you thoughts and emotions. Sometimes, you need to become “free” of these emotions and I feel like the ocean might best help me complete that task.
Building the foundation of a family through a home or referring to freedom through the ocean all ties in. Being at home gives you a sense of freedom and to some the ocean can feel like home. Everyone, at some point in their lives, will need to take advantage of what a day can offer while enjoying the freedom that is there if you just look for it.
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Self Assesment
Hannah Staley
Freedom and Foundation Essay
February 5,2009
Some strong points I see in this essay: I really like the tricolon I used in this essay. I used this literary element well and I was quite proud.
Some weak points I see in this essay: A weak point I see in this essay is my closing paragraph. I believe that it is doing its job but could have been more direct.
Writing issues I am continuing to work on: I am continuing to work on deleting useless words. I feel that I am getting better but I do find my self occasionally slipping.
Grade I would give myself: B+
Mr. Salsich
English 9
February 3, 2009
Freedom and Foundation
An Essay on Imprisonment and Freedom
Being away from anything I know and love is close to unthinkable for me. My home, my freedom and my family are all things that make me who I am. If I were only allowed to see my house once a day, I would be really unhappy. The same also goes for my freedom. If I couldn’t express myself on the athletic field, conduct experiments in science class and lead the Friday GIVE meetings, school would not be nearly as fulfilling or interesting.
If I were imprisoned and could only see one thing through my window it would be my home. My home is my central point and ultimately my safety net. Home is where I can be myself and feel completely safe. I know that if I was to be homesick or in a rough situation, home is just a phone call away. Also, my home is not only a structure but a place that nurtures values. Within the walls of my home I have been taught to be clean, to respect people’s space and to love the people you are with. I have learned that when you obey the rules, not only is a family growing stronger but the walls within the house grow thick. Without my home, I don’t know where I would be. I treasure my home and its contents more than anything in the world and a day without it is unbearable to think about.
I would like to be as free as the ocean. I would like to be able to be carefree and easygoing. I would like to go with the flow and take things as they come. It would be nice to wake up one morning and let go of all life’s worries and concerns. To be able to enjoy the day and seize every moment I have with my colleagues, teammates and friends. I would also love to be as flexible as the ocean. Not being tied to a schedule five days a week and just being able to flow with different currents and land where the waves take me would be a wonderful experience. It would ensure that each day is different and unique. Being like the ocean would allow me to accomplish big and small things. Whether it’s as small as helping out a friend or as large as finding a cure for an awful disease, the opportunities are would be as varied as the ocean. But, when you look at it in the big picture, the ocean never ends. It comes and it goes just like you thoughts and emotions. Sometimes, you need to become “free” of these emotions and I feel like the ocean might best help me complete that task.
Building the foundation of a family through a home or referring to freedom through the ocean all ties in. Being at home gives you a sense of freedom and to some the ocean can feel like home. Everyone, at some point in their lives, will need to take advantage of what a day can offer while enjoying the freedom that is there if you just look for it.
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Self Assesment
Hannah Staley
Freedom and Foundation Essay
February 5,2009
Some strong points I see in this essay: I really like the tricolon I used in this essay. I used this literary element well and I was quite proud.
Some weak points I see in this essay: A weak point I see in this essay is my closing paragraph. I believe that it is doing its job but could have been more direct.
Writing issues I am continuing to work on: I am continuing to work on deleting useless words. I feel that I am getting better but I do find my self occasionally slipping.
Grade I would give myself: B+
Olivia's Essay
Olivia Denison
Mr. Salsich
English 9
5 February 2009
Freedom and Imprisonment:
What Would You Like to Look At Through Your Prison Window and What Is Freedom?
If you had the choice, what would be the one thing you would want to see in jail? What couldn’t you live without for one day? What is the most important thing in your life that you cherish so much that you wouldn’t want it to leave your side? Ferdinand from “The Tempest” would like to see the girl that he has fallen in love with, Miranda, each day because she is so beautiful and he couldn’t live without seeing her face.
Most people who are imprisoned would say they would like to see their relatives, pets, or maybe someone to confide in. What I would like to see though, is the ocean. I simply love the ocean; I love the sounds it makes when crashing against the rocks; I love how the color can change from a dark blue to a lighter blue to green, and I love how the ocean is full of possibilities, storms, the animals that live their and the things that happen in and on the ocean (Tricolon). I just ponder (FAST) all the possibilities the ocean can have: waves tiny or big, rough or bumpy, that can be fun to watch, but can also possess a destructive force. Observing the bountiful (FAST) life in the ocean and the people playing in the waves, reminds me of how life used to be. Sailing upon the waves with salt spray in my face makes me feel alive, and I would want to feel that again. If I became discouraged about something while in prison, I would listen to the waves crashing and the water seeping through the cracks in the rocks and it would calm me and put me to sleep. The ocean can change color and intensity, just as people can change their expressions, moods or opinions. The ocean inspires me to fight through the rough times and turbulent seas to eventually realize my dream of freedom.
The ocean never dies and covers nearly three-quarters of the earth. The ocean commands its own destiny and for this reason, I would like to be as free as the ocean. To have the power of movement, to have a mind of your own, to have no one tell you what to do and to have the power to create, would be invigorating (Tricolon/FAST). I would be free to crash, move and create currents wherever and whenever, and bring pleasure to people. No one could control me or attach strings to me or capture me in a cage, because as water I would have no boundaries and could assume the shape of my surroundings. I could swallow a boat or give the people the ride of their lives. I could make a rogue(FAST) wave and destroy something and only land could block me. Freedom is having no one to dictate to you or control you, but rather possessing your own opinion with the power to accomplish anything.
If I was imprisoned, my thoughts of the ocean would provide inspiration that maybe someday I would be as free as the ocean. If I was as free as the ocean, though, I wouldn’t abuse my power and destroy things or scare or hurt people. I would be a warm fun relaxing place, so that maybe somewhere someone who is imprisoned would be looking out through a window, admiring my freedom.
Mr. Salsich
English 9
5 February 2009
Freedom and Imprisonment:
What Would You Like to Look At Through Your Prison Window and What Is Freedom?
If you had the choice, what would be the one thing you would want to see in jail? What couldn’t you live without for one day? What is the most important thing in your life that you cherish so much that you wouldn’t want it to leave your side? Ferdinand from “The Tempest” would like to see the girl that he has fallen in love with, Miranda, each day because she is so beautiful and he couldn’t live without seeing her face.
Most people who are imprisoned would say they would like to see their relatives, pets, or maybe someone to confide in. What I would like to see though, is the ocean. I simply love the ocean; I love the sounds it makes when crashing against the rocks; I love how the color can change from a dark blue to a lighter blue to green, and I love how the ocean is full of possibilities, storms, the animals that live their and the things that happen in and on the ocean (Tricolon). I just ponder (FAST) all the possibilities the ocean can have: waves tiny or big, rough or bumpy, that can be fun to watch, but can also possess a destructive force. Observing the bountiful (FAST) life in the ocean and the people playing in the waves, reminds me of how life used to be. Sailing upon the waves with salt spray in my face makes me feel alive, and I would want to feel that again. If I became discouraged about something while in prison, I would listen to the waves crashing and the water seeping through the cracks in the rocks and it would calm me and put me to sleep. The ocean can change color and intensity, just as people can change their expressions, moods or opinions. The ocean inspires me to fight through the rough times and turbulent seas to eventually realize my dream of freedom.
The ocean never dies and covers nearly three-quarters of the earth. The ocean commands its own destiny and for this reason, I would like to be as free as the ocean. To have the power of movement, to have a mind of your own, to have no one tell you what to do and to have the power to create, would be invigorating (Tricolon/FAST). I would be free to crash, move and create currents wherever and whenever, and bring pleasure to people. No one could control me or attach strings to me or capture me in a cage, because as water I would have no boundaries and could assume the shape of my surroundings. I could swallow a boat or give the people the ride of their lives. I could make a rogue(FAST) wave and destroy something and only land could block me. Freedom is having no one to dictate to you or control you, but rather possessing your own opinion with the power to accomplish anything.
If I was imprisoned, my thoughts of the ocean would provide inspiration that maybe someday I would be as free as the ocean. If I was as free as the ocean, though, I wouldn’t abuse my power and destroy things or scare or hurt people. I would be a warm fun relaxing place, so that maybe somewhere someone who is imprisoned would be looking out through a window, admiring my freedom.
Monday, February 2, 2009
Eleanor's Polished Essay #11
Themes are found anywhere and everywhere, whether from a book, play or in real life. Throughout The Tempest so far, there have also been many themes. The most prominent of which is imprisonment and freedom. Many of the characters have dealt with at least one of the two, and I have, and continue, to experience freedom, but what would I want in imprisonment? And how do I really want to feel, or do feel about freedom?
The Question is: “If you were imprisoned, and had only two things or people you could see outside your cell window, what would you like there to be?”. My answer to this is simply be nothing. If I were stuck in a cell, and outside saw a lush wide open field, I would instantly crave being there. This is the same as someone who is craving food but forgot a lunch and every-one else around you was eating. Many prisoners of the now shut-down prison of Alcatraz said that it wasn’t the fact that they were in a prison that tormented them, but the fact that they could see civilization. They could see freedom from outside their windows. They could imagine it all, but they would never again be a part of the life they used to know. (Tricolon) I am thankful to not be imprisoned, and am able to experience all of the joys and experiences that come from life. Sometimes I wonder why so many people of our world simply throw it away.
The other part of the theme also interests me, freedom. We are asked to write an ending to “I would like to be as free as…”. My answer to this question is, I would like to be as free as I am. In my thirteen years of life I feel that I have never been confined to one space, I have never been told just to sit and wait, and I have never been limited mentally. (Tricolon) However I have always thought and created to my hearts content, and have always had partial or complete input in what I can or would do next. Unfortunately many people could not say the same as I just have. Slaves are forced to do what their master tells them, and nothing else. Handicapped people have limitations even in everyday life. I am thankful to have all of my abilities and thankful to be able to simply be me, without anything or anyone speaking against that.
I had know idea two simple themes from a play written over three-hundred and fifty years ago could have such meaning to life today in 2009. If we were all characters in a play of any genre, I am sure that one of themes would be imprisonment and freedom.
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Graphic Organiser:
Intro:
The Tempest has many themes, freedom and imprisonment. The two questions
1st Body:
SD: I wouldn't want to see anything at all
CM's: examples, lush field, food
SD: Alcatraz prisoners
CM's: not being able to live in civilization, but see it everyday tormented many of them
2nd Body:
SD: free as I am
CM's: I have always done things without imprisonment
SD: Others are not so lucky
CM's: Handicapped people, Slaves
Conclusion:
No idea that two themes could affect us so much
The Question is: “If you were imprisoned, and had only two things or people you could see outside your cell window, what would you like there to be?”. My answer to this is simply be nothing. If I were stuck in a cell, and outside saw a lush wide open field, I would instantly crave being there. This is the same as someone who is craving food but forgot a lunch and every-one else around you was eating. Many prisoners of the now shut-down prison of Alcatraz said that it wasn’t the fact that they were in a prison that tormented them, but the fact that they could see civilization. They could see freedom from outside their windows. They could imagine it all, but they would never again be a part of the life they used to know. (Tricolon) I am thankful to not be imprisoned, and am able to experience all of the joys and experiences that come from life. Sometimes I wonder why so many people of our world simply throw it away.
The other part of the theme also interests me, freedom. We are asked to write an ending to “I would like to be as free as…”. My answer to this question is, I would like to be as free as I am. In my thirteen years of life I feel that I have never been confined to one space, I have never been told just to sit and wait, and I have never been limited mentally. (Tricolon) However I have always thought and created to my hearts content, and have always had partial or complete input in what I can or would do next. Unfortunately many people could not say the same as I just have. Slaves are forced to do what their master tells them, and nothing else. Handicapped people have limitations even in everyday life. I am thankful to have all of my abilities and thankful to be able to simply be me, without anything or anyone speaking against that.
I had know idea two simple themes from a play written over three-hundred and fifty years ago could have such meaning to life today in 2009. If we were all characters in a play of any genre, I am sure that one of themes would be imprisonment and freedom.
*************************************************
Graphic Organiser:
Intro:
The Tempest has many themes, freedom and imprisonment. The two questions
1st Body:
SD: I wouldn't want to see anything at all
CM's: examples, lush field, food
SD: Alcatraz prisoners
CM's: not being able to live in civilization, but see it everyday tormented many of them
2nd Body:
SD: free as I am
CM's: I have always done things without imprisonment
SD: Others are not so lucky
CM's: Handicapped people, Slaves
Conclusion:
No idea that two themes could affect us so much
1st Body Paragraph
If I were imprisoned and could only see one thing through my window it would be my home. My home is my central point and ultimately my safety net. Home is where I can be myself and feel completely safe. I know that if I was to be homesick or in a rough situation, home is just a phone call away. Also, my home is not only a structure but a place that nurtures values. Within the walls of my home I have been taught to be clean, to respect people’s space and to love the people you are with. I have learned that when you obey the rules, not only is a family growing stronger but the walls within the house grow thick. Without my home, I don’t know where I would be. I treasure this home and its contents more than anything in the world and a day without it is unbearable to think about.
Sunday, February 1, 2009
Hannah's Polished Essay
Hannah Staley
English 9
Mr. Hamilton Salsich
29 January 2009
Servitude vs. Confinment
An essay on the similarities and differences of servitude and confinement shown in characters Caliban and Ariel
Reflecting on “servitude and confinement”, pages 18 through 23 in The Tempest by William Shakespeare seems to be more about slavery and imprisonment than servitude and confinement. Describing Ariel and Caliban as servants does not seem harsh enough. The both are really slaves who are controlled by Sycorax and Prospero. Servitude seems to be a way to describe their predicament (FAST).
Being trapped in a “cloven pine” by Sycorax and threatened with 12 more years of confinement in an Oak tree by Prospero tells us that Ariel is destined to a life of confinement and servitude. Arial is a shy and timid character who does not have the courage to fight back against her masters. This may be because she is hoping to be granted a year off. While ending up being in the possession of Sycorax, Ariel learned some lessons. She learned that punishment, like being limited to living in a “space” in a tree, is one way she can be controlled. She also makes the mistake of telling Prospero that she has “a spirit too delicate” for the work she was made to execute (FAST). It would have been smarter for her to be more cunning (FAST) by manipulating Sycorax and Prospero. Perhaps she will figure this out in future Acts. It would be in her best interest if she did.
Caliban is a much different character who is similar to Ariel because they are both slaves, but different in how he communicates. He is visibly angry and will do anything to try to get back all that his family has lost to Prospero and Miranda. He even goes so far as to try and sexually assault Miranda in an effort to build his own little army of Calibans. His anger is also visible when he tells Prospero “You taught me language; and my profit on’t is, I know how to curse. The red plague rid you for learning me your language.” I don’t think Ariel would have come out with such a bold statement. This is why I think Ariel may be a woman. I doubt that women would speak out as Caliban did in that day and age.
Identifying similarities between Ariel and Caliban is interesting, but more difficult than identifying their differences. They deal with situations and people in different ways but their plights (FAST) are the same. It will be interesting to see if they end up the same way or if either one of them ever escapes servitude and confinement.
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Self Assesment:
Hannah Staley
February 1st, 2009
Servitude vs. Confinement
Some Strong Points I see in this essay: A strong point I see in this essay is my opening paragraph. I feel that I did a good job of summarizing what is to come and it flows nicely.
Some Weak Points I see in this essay: A weak point I see is my use of quotes. I am still working on finding the right one to make the sentence work. I feel that I am slowly making progress, but I could still use some help.
Writing Issues I am continuing to work on: writing issues I am continuing to work on is omitting unnecessary words. I think I have made a good job with this but there is always room for improvement.
Grade I would give myself: B+
English 9
Mr. Hamilton Salsich
29 January 2009
Servitude vs. Confinment
An essay on the similarities and differences of servitude and confinement shown in characters Caliban and Ariel
Reflecting on “servitude and confinement”, pages 18 through 23 in The Tempest by William Shakespeare seems to be more about slavery and imprisonment than servitude and confinement. Describing Ariel and Caliban as servants does not seem harsh enough. The both are really slaves who are controlled by Sycorax and Prospero. Servitude seems to be a way to describe their predicament (FAST).
Being trapped in a “cloven pine” by Sycorax and threatened with 12 more years of confinement in an Oak tree by Prospero tells us that Ariel is destined to a life of confinement and servitude. Arial is a shy and timid character who does not have the courage to fight back against her masters. This may be because she is hoping to be granted a year off. While ending up being in the possession of Sycorax, Ariel learned some lessons. She learned that punishment, like being limited to living in a “space” in a tree, is one way she can be controlled. She also makes the mistake of telling Prospero that she has “a spirit too delicate” for the work she was made to execute (FAST). It would have been smarter for her to be more cunning (FAST) by manipulating Sycorax and Prospero. Perhaps she will figure this out in future Acts. It would be in her best interest if she did.
Caliban is a much different character who is similar to Ariel because they are both slaves, but different in how he communicates. He is visibly angry and will do anything to try to get back all that his family has lost to Prospero and Miranda. He even goes so far as to try and sexually assault Miranda in an effort to build his own little army of Calibans. His anger is also visible when he tells Prospero “You taught me language; and my profit on’t is, I know how to curse. The red plague rid you for learning me your language.” I don’t think Ariel would have come out with such a bold statement. This is why I think Ariel may be a woman. I doubt that women would speak out as Caliban did in that day and age.
Identifying similarities between Ariel and Caliban is interesting, but more difficult than identifying their differences. They deal with situations and people in different ways but their plights (FAST) are the same. It will be interesting to see if they end up the same way or if either one of them ever escapes servitude and confinement.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Self Assesment:
Hannah Staley
February 1st, 2009
Servitude vs. Confinement
Some Strong Points I see in this essay: A strong point I see in this essay is my opening paragraph. I feel that I did a good job of summarizing what is to come and it flows nicely.
Some Weak Points I see in this essay: A weak point I see is my use of quotes. I am still working on finding the right one to make the sentence work. I feel that I am slowly making progress, but I could still use some help.
Writing Issues I am continuing to work on: writing issues I am continuing to work on is omitting unnecessary words. I think I have made a good job with this but there is always room for improvement.
Grade I would give myself: B+
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