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Created by Hannah, Zack, Eleanor, and Olivia
Essay Labels!
- Eleanor (20)
- Hannah Staley (32)
- Olivia (24)
- The Tempest (2)
- Zack (21)
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2 comments:
Dear Zack,
I loved the opening paragraph! It really couldn't be much better. (I wish I had written it!)
"While ultimately unimportant to the main theme of the essay this vivid opening paragraph..." COMMA AFTER 'ESSAY'.
intersperse the rest of the essay with description ... SHOULD BE 'INTERSPERSES' AND 'DESCRIPTIONS' ... BE WATCHFUL FOR LITTLE MISTAKES LIKE THESE.
describing the migration of the Kiowa he ... COMMA AFTER 'KIOWA'
a “head-fake”, the ...YOU NEED A PERIOD OR SEMICOLON AFTER 'FAKE'. THESE LITTLE ERRORS CAN DAMAGE AN OTHERWISE BRILLIANT ESSAY.
...........
ZACK, DESPITE THE CARELESS MISTAKES, I ADMIRE THIS WRITING VERY MUCH. IT BRINGS FORTH YOUR GENUINE TALENT AS A SENSITIVE THINKER AND AUTHOR. IT MIGHT BE THE BEST ESSAY YOU'VE WRITTEN FOR ME. YOU ARE good!!! (BUT LET'S GET THOSE MISTAKES UNDER CONTROL.)
--Mr. Salsich
NICE!:)
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